During the holidays we always make a four hour trip to visit both of our families. This year we opted not to....the last time we were down there in June was to welcome and celebrate the upcoming birth of our little one. It was definitely going to be to difficult to see family but also knowing we were leaving Jeremiah behind 4 hours away was a nagging thought. Plus my brother and sister-in-law just welcomed their third little boy and my cousin had her little girl on Jeremiah's due date.I just could not do it this year. Because of this my mom came to visit this past weekend to give M his Christmas presents and to spend some time with us. I really missed her and was so glad she came.
While she was here she told me about another cousin who lives in Texas that also lost their baby a couple of months after we loss Jeremiah. His wife was 24 weeks along and they went in for a scheduled ultrasound and their was no heartbeat. This family also has a little boy already about 2 years older than my M. They were also really excited to have another little boy join their family. These are all the things that were the same between our 2 stories. Now here is the difference- they chose not to bury their baby. They left him in the hospital, so the hospital could take care of the body. They also chose not to name their son and also choose not to talk or remember him. This I definitely do not understand. I know everyone grieves differently but in my eyes (my eyes doesn't mean I am right) this sounds so cold and harsh. I would not know how to go from planning a nursery and giving that little person an identity in my family and just being able to just wipe it from the slate. It is hard for me to forget him and I make it a point to include his name and memory to all we do as a family. I guess I will never understand but I do hope they find a way to cope and find peace because I am sure it is not easy.
Tomorrow marks the 6 month mark of when we loss Jeremiah. I can't believe it has been half a year already.....I miss him so much and can only hope that God is teaching him about his family who walk the earth.
I LOVE YOU JEREMIAH!!
1 comments:
People do grieve differently. I know parents who cant look at pictures of their deceased children, as well as ones who chose to just go on as though life didnt change. I believe it is the way their minds begin to work through the grief so that they can function. While it isnt my way, I think it is their hearts trying to protect them. But, I agree with you.
Hugs...
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